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Cannabis Has No Significant Impact on Working Memory or Cognitive Function Finds New Medical Study

Published

6 days ago

October 10, 2024

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cannabis memory functions

Oops! Cannabis doesn’t impact working memory and other brain processes

https://www.marijuanamoment.net/marijuana-use-does-not-impact-working-

memory-and-other-brain-processes-american-medical-association-study-finds/

We’ve all heard it before: “Smoking weed kills brain cells!” This tired trope has been circulating for decades, fueled by prohibitionist propaganda and questionable studies. Remember that infamous experiment where they essentially suffocated monkeys with cannabis smoke and then blamed their brain damage on marijuana? Yeah, that’s the kind of “science” we’re dealing with here, folks.

The truth is, cannabis doesn’t impair people nearly as much as the prohibition machine would have you believe. But boy, have they tried to convince us otherwise! For years, they’ve churned out study after study, desperately attempting to prove that marijuana turns your brain into Swiss cheese. When they couldn’t find solid evidence, they resorted to sowing uncertainty and fear. It’s almost like they don’t want us to know the truth…

Well, guess what? A new study just dropped a truth bomb on these antiquated notions. Researchers found that there’s no statistically significant impact on working memory and other cognitive functions that have long been claimed as casualties of cannabis use. That’s right – all those warnings about becoming a forgetful, unmotivated couch potato? They’re going up in smoke.

In this article, we’re going to take a closer look at this groundbreaking study. We’ll dive into the details, break down the findings, and hopefully illuminate the truth about c annabis and its effects on the brain. It’s time to separate fact from fiction and put these old myths to rest once and for all.

So, grab your favorite strain, settle in, and let’s explore why the “weed makes you dumb” narrative is about as outdated as Reefer Madness. It’s time to set the record straight and celebrate the fascinating relationship between cannabis and cognition.

Let’s dive into this groundbreaking research that’s shaking up long-held beliefs about cannabis and cognition. The study, published in JAMA Network Open and funded by the National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), offers compelling evidence that medical marijuana use doesn’t significantly impact key brain processes.

The researchers recruited 57 newly certified medical marijuana patients from the Boston area and used functional magnetic resonance imaging (fMRI) to monitor their brain activity during various mental tasks. They then repeated these scans after a year of medical cannabis use to look for changes. The results? Surprisingly reassuring for cannabis users.

According to the study, “Working memory, reward, and inhibitory control tasks did not differ statistically from baseline to 1 year and were not associated with changes in cannabis use frequency.” In other words, after a year of medical marijuana use, participants showed no significant changes in these crucial cognitive functions.

The authors didn’t mince words about their findings: “Our results suggest that adults who use cannabis, generally with light to moderate use patterns, for symptoms of pain, anxiety, depression, or poor sleep, experience few significant long-term neural associations in these areas of cognition.”

But let’s pump the brakes for a second. While these results are exciting, it’s important to note some limitations. The study focused on adults using medical marijuana, typically with light to moderate use patterns. The researchers themselves acknowledge that “The results warrant further studies that probe the association of cannabis at higher doses, with greater frequency, in younger age groups, and with larger, more diverse cohorts.”

Despite these limitations, this study is crucial because it challenges the long-standing narrative that cannabis use inevitably leads to cognitive decline. It reminds us of the importance of ongoing, rigorous research in this field. For decades, prohibition has hindered comprehensive studies on cannabis, leaving us with a patchwork of often contradictory information.

This research underscores why we should always remain open-minded and ready to update our “mental firmware” when new evidence presents itself. Science is an evolving process, and what we thought we knew about cannabis even a few years ago may not hold up under closer scrutiny.

The study’s authors themselves seemed surprised by their findings, stating, “The absence of evidence for cognitive impairment following medical cannabis self-administration was surprising, given prior and substantive evidence that non-medical (‘recreational’) cannabis use reliably impairs a range of cognitive functions.”

This statement highlights how deeply ingrained the notion of cannabis-induced cognitive impairment has become, even among researchers. It’s a stark reminder of how prohibition-era propaganda can influence scientific expectations and why we need to approach cannabis research with fresh, unbiased eyes.

Moreover, this study aligns with other recent findings that challenge the “cannabis is bad for your brain” narrative. For instance, NIDA itself has stated that results from two longitudinal studies “did not support a causal relationship between marijuana use and IQ loss.”

As we continue to peel back the layers of misinformation surrounding cannabis, studies like this one are invaluable. They provide a more nuanced, evidence-based understanding of how cannabis interacts with our brains and bodies. While there’s still much to learn, this research offers a compelling counterpoint to decades of fear-mongering and oversimplification.

So, the next time someone tries to tell you that cannabis will fry your brain, you can point them to this study. It’s a powerful reminder that when it comes to cannabis, the truth is often more complex – and more promising – than prohibition would have us believe.

Let’s face it, folks: the idea that cannabis users are all lazy, unmotivated, or intellectually dulled is about as outdated as a flip phone. The truth is, many highly intelligent, high-functioning individuals prefer cannabis over alcohol for a myriad of reasons. And no, they’re not sacrificing their brain cells or ambitions in the process.

Cannabis, when used mindfully, can be a powerful tool for destressing, improving sleep quality, enhancing appetite, and clearing mental clutter. Unlike alcohol, which can leave you with a nasty hangover and impaired cognitive function the next day, cannabis often allows users to wake up refreshed and ready to tackle their responsibilities.

Now, let’s talk numbers. The average cannabis smoker consumes about 7 grams a week, which might sound like “heavy use” to the uninitiated. But here’s the kicker – for regular users who have built up a tolerance, this level of consumption often doesn’t impact their daily functioning at all. It’s all about understanding your own body and how you react to cannabis.

Take me, for example. I smoke virtually every day, but I’ve learned to time it right. My cannabis use starts when my workday ends, allowing me to unwind and transition into my evening routine. Sometimes, I’ll indulge when working on creative projects, but this is after years of understanding how cannabis affects my thought processes and productivity. It’s not about getting “blazed out of my mind” – it’s about using cannabis as a tool to enhance my life and work.

This pattern is true for most regular users. We’re not blindly consuming; we’re actively learning how cannabis affects us and adjusting our habits accordingly. Some folks might find they’re most productive after a small dose in the morning, while others, like myself, prefer to save it for after-hours relaxation. The key is self-awareness and responsible use.

So, let’s put this “weed will make you dumb” argument to bed once and for all. It’s not based on reality but rather on some perverse prohibitionist fantasy that justifies the harm their policies inflict on society. They’ve spent decades trying to convince us that cannabis users are destined for cognitive decline, but the evidence simply doesn’t support this claim.

The proverbial cat is out of the bag, folks. As more research emerges and more states legalize, it’s becoming increasingly clear that cannabis isn’t the brain-cell assassin it was made out to be. Sure, like any substance, it should be used responsibly and in moderation. But the fear-mongering about inevitable cognitive decline? That’s going up in smoke.

From tech entrepreneurs to artists, scientists to athletes, there are countless examples of successful, intelligent individuals who incorporate cannabis into their lives. They’re not succeeding despite their cannabis use – in many cases, they credit cannabis with helping them manage stress, boost creativity, or recover from the demands of their high-pressure careers.

So the next time someone tries to tell you that cannabis will inevitably lead to cognitive decline, remember this: some of the smartest, most successful people you know might just be cannabis enthusiasts. They’re living proof that with responsible use and self-awareness, cannabis can be a part of a fulfilling, intellectually stimulating life. The “dumb stoner” stereotype? That’s what’s really going up in smoke.

MARIJUANA AND MEMORY FUNCTION, READ ON…

BABY BOOMERS TAKING CANNABIS TO IMPROVE THEIR MEMORY, SAY WHAT?

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Adults are Consuming Cannabis and Psychedelics at Record High Levels

Published

2 days ago

October 14, 2024

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adults using psychedelics and cannabis

Adults still consuming cannabis and psychedelic at record highs according to the NIH

https://www.nih.gov/news-events/news-releases/cannabis-hallucinogen-use-among-adults-remained-historic-highs-2023

Since the world got flipped upside down by COVID-19, we’ve witnessed a fascinating shift in the landscape of psychoactive substance consumption. But here’s the kicker – it’s not the youngsters leading this charge into altered states of consciousness. No, my friends, it’s the adults who are blazing this trail, and boy, are they blazing it hard.

According to recent studies by the National Institutes of Health, adults are indulging in cannabis and psychedelics at historic highs, leaving researchers scratching their heads and wondering, “What’s the deal?” As someone who’s spent the better part of two decades exploring the vast frontiers of consciousness through various herbal and fungal allies, I feel uniquely qualified to offer my two cents on this phenomenon.

Now, I’m not claiming to have all the answers. Hell, half the time I’m not even sure I know the right questions. But after years of personal experience and countless conversations with fellow psychonauts, I’ve developed some theories about why more adults are choosing to tune in and drop out in these turbulent times.

So, dear readers, I invite you to kick back, maybe roll up a little something if that’s your jam (no judgment here), and join me as we dive deep into the reasons behind this psychedelic renaissance among the “grown-ups.” We’ll explore the data, ponder the implications, and maybe even have a few laughs along the way. After all, if there’s one thing I’ve learned from my journeys, it’s that sometimes the most profound insights come wrapped in a giggle.

Let’s unravel this mystery together and see if we can’t shed some light on why adults are entering the psychedelic realms in record numbers. It’s going to be one hell of a trip.

let’s dive into the nitty-gritty of what the eggheads at the National Institutes of Health uncovered in their latest Monitoring the Future study. Buckle up, because these findings are about as mind-bending as a potent edible.

First off, let’s talk numbers. The study, which has been tracking substance use since 1975, revealed that cannabis and hallucinogen use among adults remained at historic highs in 2023. We’re not talking about a little bump here, folks. According to Dr. Nora D. Volkow, director of NIH’s National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA), “We have seen that people at different stages of adulthood are trending toward use of drugs like cannabis and psychedelics and away from tobacco cigarettes.” It’s like we’ve collectively decided to trade in our cancer sticks for some consciousness expansion.

Let’s break it down by age groups. Among adults aged 19 to 30, a whopping 42% reported cannabis use in the past year, with 29% lighting up in the past month, and 10% indulging daily. That’s a lot of joints, folks. For the 35 to 50 crowd, the numbers were 29%, 19%, and 8% respectively. While these numbers didn’t change much from 2022, they represent significant increases over the past five and ten years.

But here’s where it gets really interesting. For the first time in the study’s history, women in the 19-30 age group outpaced men in past-year cannabis use. That’s right, ladies and gentlemen, the fairer sex is leading the charge into the green frontier. As a long-time observer of cannabis culture, I find this shift fascinating. Could it be that women are finally feeling more comfortable embracing Mary Jane publicly? Or perhaps they’re just better at multitasking their highs with adulting?

Interestingly, this gender flip doesn’t extend to the older crowd. Among the 35-50 year olds, men still reign supreme in cannabis consumption, maintaining a higher prevalence of past-year use than women. It seems the old boys’ club is still alive and well in some circles.

Now, let’s talk about the importance of this data. The Monitoring the Future study isn’t just some random survey. It’s been tracking substance use behaviors and attitudes since 1975, following a nationally representative sample from their teen years well into adulthood. This longitudinal approach gives us a unique window into how drug use patterns evolve over a lifetime.

As Megan Patrick, Ph.D., principal investigator of the study, puts it, “The power of surveys such as Monitoring the Future is to see the ebb and flow of various substance use trends over the longer term.” In other words, this isn’t just a snapshot; it’s a full-length feature film of America’s relationship with drugs.

What’s particularly exciting is that the study is now reaching new milestones. In 2023, for the first time, a cohort from the study reached 65 years of age. Soon, we’ll be able to track substance use trends among retirees. Imagine the potential headlines: “Seniors Swapping Bingo for Bongs?”

In all seriousness, this data is crucial for informing public health strategies and drug policies. As Dr. Volkow notes, these findings “underscore the urgent need for rigorous research on the potential risks and benefits of cannabis and hallucinogens – especially as new products continue to emerge.”

Adults are getting higher than ever, women are breaking grass ceilings, and we’re on the cusp of understanding drug use patterns across the entire lifespan. It’s a brave new world out there, and I, for one, can’t wait to see where this trip takes us next.

Now that we’ve waded through the scientific swamp, let’s dive headfirst into the philosophical deep end. Buckle up, because we’re about to get metaphysical.

These days, the world feels like it’s been tossed into a cosmic blender set to “puree.” We’ve got natural disasters popping up like whack-a-mole, wars erupting faster than you can say “geopolitical tension,” and don’t even get me started on the rollercoaster ride that is modern politics and finance. It’s enough to make your average Joe’s head spin faster than a Grateful Dead vinyl.

In this constant state of flux, we mere mortals find ourselves desperately trying to keep our footing. Humans, by nature, are creatures of habit. We love our routines. They’re like warm, comfy blankets for our brains. But when the world around us starts shape-shifting like some cosmic Transformer, those cozy neural pathways can quickly become prison cells.

I call this phenomenon “neuro-lock.” It’s when our well-worn behavioral patterns become barriers, preventing us from adapting to the ever-changing landscape around us. We’re like old dogs stubbornly refusing to learn new tricks, even as the ground beneath our paws turns to quicksand.

Enter psychedelics, stage left. These mind-bending substances are like WD-40 for our rusty neural gears. They induce a state of neuroplasticity, allowing us to break free from our habitual thought patterns and explore new mental territories. It’s like trading in your trusty old bicycle for a flying carpet – suddenly, you’re not bound by the roads anymore.

This newfound mental flexibility could explain why more people are turning to psychedelics to cope with our rapidly changing world. When reality starts feeling like a Salvador Dali painting, sometimes you need to dive into the surreal to make sense of it all.

But it’s not just about adapting to change. There’s a spiritual component to this psychedelic renaissance too. Over the past few decades, we’ve seen a steady decline in traditional religiosity. People are drifting away from organized religion, but that doesn’t mean they’ve lost the yearning for transcendent experiences.

Psychedelics, while not a direct substitute for spirituality, certainly tap into that same cosmic vein. A strong dose of psilocybin can make you feel more connected to the universe than a lifetime of Sunday school. LSD might have you conversing with entities that make the burning bush look like a casual chat. And DMT? Well, let’s just say it’s not called the “spirit molecule” for nothing.

One thing’s for certain: we’re living in a brave new world. The old structures are crumbling, and something new is emerging from the rubble. Psychedelics could very well be the scaffolding we need to build this new reality. They’re like training wheels for our collective consciousness as we learn to navigate this unfamiliar terrain.

Now, I’ll be the first to admit that this is all speculation. I’m not claiming to have a hotline to the cosmic truth. But when you look at the global shifts happening around us and the skyrocketing rates of psychedelic use, it’s hard not to see a connection.

We’re in the midst of a neo-revolution, folks. The future is going to look wildly different from our past, and psychedelics might just be the bridge between the two. Will we emerge from this chrysalis as beautiful, enlightened butterflies? Or will we end up as cosmic roadkill on the highway of evolution? Your guess is as good as mine.

But one thing’s for sure – it’s going to be one hell of a trip. So grab your metaphysical seatbelts, because the journey’s just beginning. And who knows? Maybe at the end of this long, strange trip, we’ll find a world that’s a little bit wiser, a little bit kinder, and a whole lot more interesting. Or maybe we’ll just have really good stories to tell.

Either way, I’m here for it.

CANNABIS USE SKYROCKETS IN ADULTS, READ ON…

HOW MANY AMERICANS USE CANNABIS EVERYDAY? SAY WHAT?

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CBD-Rich Extracts Help Mitigate Autism Symptoms in Kids and Teens Says Medical Study

Published

3 days ago

October 13, 2024

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cbd extracts for autism

Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) is a complex neurodevelopmental condition that affects communication, behavior, and social interaction. With prevalence rates rising globally, there is an urgent need for effective treatments that can help manage the diverse symptoms associated with ASD. Recent studies have begun to explore the potential therapeutic benefits of cannabinoids, particularly Cannabinoids (CBD), a non-psychoactive compound found in cannabis. A groundbreaking observational study conducted in Brazil has provided compelling evidence that CBD-rich extracts may significantly mitigate symptoms in adolescents with autism. This article will delve into the study’s findings, the implications for treatment, and the broader context of cannabinoid research in autism.

Understanding Autism Spectrum Disorder

What is Autism Spectrum Disorder?

ASD encompasses a range of conditions characterized by challenges in social skills, repetitive behaviors, speech, and nonverbal communication. The severity and combination of symptoms can vary widely among individuals, making ASD a spectrum disorder. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), approximately 1 in 44 children in the United States is diagnosed with ASD, highlighting the growing public health concern surrounding this condition.

Current Treatment Approaches

Currently, there is no cure for autism, and treatment typically involves a combination of behavioral therapies, educational interventions, and, in some cases, pharmacological approaches. Medications such as selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), antipsychotics, and stimulants are often prescribed to manage specific symptoms, including anxiety, irritability, and attention deficits. However, these medications can have side effects and may not be effective for all individuals, prompting the search for alternative therapies.

The Role of Cannabinoids in Autism Treatment

What are Cannabinoids?

Cannabinoids are chemical compounds found in the cannabis plant. The two most well-known cannabinoids are tetrahydrocannabinol (THC), which is psychoactive, and CBD, which is non-psychoactive. CBD has garnered attention for its potential therapeutic effects, including anti-inflammatory, anxiolytic, and neuroprotective properties.

The Endocannabinoid System

The endocannabinoid system (ECS) is a complex cell-signaling system that plays a crucial role in regulating various physiological processes, including mood, memory, and immune response. The ECS consists of cannabinoid receptors (CB1 and CB2), endocannabinoids produced by the body, and enzymes that break down these compounds. Research suggests that the ECS may be involved in the pathophysiology of autism, and modulating this system with cannabinoids like CBD could offer new avenues for treatment.

Research on Cannabinoids and Autism

Preclinical Studies

Preclinical studies have provided insights into the potential effects of CBD on behaviors associated with ASD. Animal models have demonstrated that CBD may reduce anxiety-like behaviors and improve social interaction. For instance, research involving rodents has shown that CBD administration can lead to increased social behaviors and decreased anxiety, suggesting that it may help address some core symptoms of ASD.

Clinical Studies

While preclinical research is promising, clinical studies are essential for understanding how CBD-rich extracts may benefit adolescents with ASD. Several recent studies have explored this topic:

Brazilian Observational Study (2024)

A landmark observational study conducted in Brazil involved 60 adolescents diagnosed with moderate to severe ASD. Participants were administered CBD-rich extracts for six months. The results were encouraging, with 70% of participants showing clinical improvements in areas such as attention, communication, and overall behavior. Notably, 74% of participants were able to reduce or discontinue at least one prescription medication, highlighting the potential of CBD as an adjunct or alternative treatment.

Israeli Open-Label Study

An open-label study conducted in Israel assessed the effects of CBD-rich cannabis treatment on children and adolescents with ASD. The study involved 30 participants who received CBD for six months. Clinical assessments, including the Autism Diagnostic Observation Schedule (ADOS), revealed significant improvements in social communication abilities. Parents reported enhanced social interactions and reduced behavioral issues, suggesting that CBD may positively impact the quality of life for adolescents with ASD.

Case Report of a Teenager with ASD

A case report detailed the experience of a teenager with ASD who exhibited aggressive behaviors and hyperactivity. After incorporating a terpene-enriched CBD oil into his treatment regimen, the patient experienced a complete elimination of aggressive behaviors. Remarkably, this allowed for a reduction in his CBD dosage by more than half, indicating that targeted formulations may enhance therapeutic outcomes while minimizing side effects.

Italian Observational Study

An observational study conducted in Italy involved 50 children with ASD who received whole-plant cannabis extracts with a 20:1 ratio of CBD to THC. The results indicated that 61% of participants experienced significant improvements in behavioral outbreaks. Parents reported enhanced emotional regulation and decreased aggression, further supporting the potential of CBD-rich extracts in managing challenging behaviors associated with ASD.

Mechanisms Behind CBD’s Therapeutic Effects

The therapeutic effects of CBD-rich extracts in adolescents with ASD may be attributed to several mechanisms:

Anxiolytic Properties: CBD has been shown to reduce anxiety in both preclinical and clinical studies. By alleviating anxiety, CBD may help improve social interactions and communication skills in adolescents with ASD.

Neuroprotective Effects: CBD’s neuroprotective properties may support brain health and development, potentially benefiting adolescents with neurodevelopmental disorders like ASD.

Regulation of Serotonin: CBD may influence serotonin receptors, which play a critical role in mood regulation. This could help address co-occurring mood disorders often seen in individuals with ASD.

Reduction of Inflammation: Inflammation has been implicated in various neurodevelopmental disorders. CBD’s anti-inflammatory effects may contribute to improved overall well-being in adolescents with ASD.

Potential Benefits of CBD-Rich Extracts

The studies mentioned above suggest that CBD-rich extracts may lead to significant improvements in behavioral outcomes for adolescents with ASD. Parents and caregivers have reported reductions in aggression, hyperactivity, and self-injurious behaviors, which are common challenges faced by individuals on the autism spectrum.

Social communication is often a significant area of difficulty for adolescents with ASD. The evidence indicates that CBD may help improve social skills and facilitate better interactions with peers and family members. By reducing anxiety and promoting a sense of calm, CBD may create an environment conducive to social engagement.

Anxiety is a prevalent issue among adolescents with ASD. CBD’s anxiolytic properties may help alleviate anxiety symptoms, allowing individuals to navigate social situations with greater ease. This reduction in anxiety can lead to improved overall quality of life and increased participation in social activities.

Many adolescents with ASD experience sleep disturbances, which can exacerbate behavioral issues and impact overall well-being. Preliminary research suggests that CBD may help improve sleep quality by promoting relaxation and reducing anxiety. Better sleep can, in turn, lead to improved mood and behavior during the day.

Ultimately, the goal of any treatment is to enhance the quality of life for individuals with ASD and their families. The positive outcomes reported in studies involving CBD-rich extracts indicate that these therapies may contribute to a better overall quality of life for adolescents with autism. Improved behavior, social interactions, and emotional regulation can lead to more fulfilling relationships and experiences.

Considerations for Use

Safety Profile of CBD

One of the significant advantages of CBD-rich extracts is their safety profile. Unlike many psychiatric medications, which can have a range of side effects, CBD is generally well-tolerated. Common side effects, when they occur, may include fatigue, diarrhea, and changes in appetite. However, these effects are typically mild and transient.

Dosage and Administration

Determining the appropriate dosage of CBD for adolescents with ASD can be challenging, as individual responses can vary widely. Most studies have used a range of dosages, and it is essential for caregivers to work closely with healthcare professionals to establish a suitable regimen. Starting with a low dose and gradually increasing it while monitoring for effects is often recommended.

Legal and Regulatory Considerations

The legal status of CBD varies by region, and caregivers should be aware of the regulations governing its use. In many places, CBD derived from hemp (containing less than 0.3% THC) is legal, while cannabis products containing higher THC levels may be subject to stricter regulations. It is crucial for families to ensure they are obtaining CBD products from reputable sources that provide third-party lab testing to verify purity and potency.

Integration with Other Treatments

CBD should not be viewed as a standalone treatment for ASD but rather as a potential adjunct to existing therapies. Families should work with healthcare providers to integrate CBD into a comprehensive treatment plan that may include behavioral therapies, educational support, and other interventions.

The Future of Cannabinoid Therapy in Autism

The promising results from the Brazilian study may pave the way for broader acceptance of cannabinoid therapies in autism treatment. As public interest in alternative therapies rises, healthcare providers and researchers must collaborate to ensure that patients receive safe, effective, and evidence-based treatments.

Conclusion

The evidence supporting the use of CBD-rich extracts for mitigating symptoms in adolescents with autism is promising. While more research is needed to establish definitive conclusions, existing studies suggest that CBD may improve behavioral outcomes, enhance social interactions, reduce anxiety, and ultimately improve the quality of life for adolescents with ASD.As families consider CBD as a treatment option, it is essential to approach it with careful consideration, working closely with healthcare professionals to create a personalized and comprehensive treatment plan. The journey toward finding effective interventions for adolescents with autism can be challenging, but the potential of CBD-rich extracts offers hope for many families seeking relief from the symptoms of this complex disorder.

In summary, while CBD is not a cure for autism, it represents a significant step forward in the search for effective therapies that can help individuals with ASD lead happier, more fulfilling lives. As research continues to unfold, the future looks promising for the integration of CBD into the broader spectrum of autism treatments.

CANNABIS AND AUTISM, READ ON…

WHAT THE BIGGEST STUDY ON AUTISM AND CANNABIS TELLS US!

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Smoking Weed Can Increase Penis Length and Girth

Published

4 days ago

October 12, 2024

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cannabis makes your penis bigger

Smoking weed can increase penis length? Nope, not satire!

I may have pulled a fast one on you with that title, but hear me out – there’s method to this madness. Today, we’re diving deep into a fascinating case study of misinformation, gullibility, and the importance of critical thinking in the age of clickbait headlines and pseudo-science.

Our subject of scrutiny? A seemingly legitimate scientific paper with the impressive title, “The Perceived Effect of Cannabis Use on Penile Growth in Humans.” This gem, published on Clinmedjournals.org, has been making the rounds, cited by various publications as cold, hard fact. There’s just one tiny problem – it’s complete and utter nonsense.

Now, before you start frantically Googling “nearest dispensary” or “how to grow weed,” take a deep breath. If you read this study closely (which, let’s be honest, most people don’t), you’ll quickly realize it’s a masterclass in satire. That’s right, this “scientific paper” is about as real as my chances of winning a slam dunk contest.

But here’s the kicker – and the reason we need to talk about this: Many people fell for it hook, line, and sinker. It’s a stark reminder of how easily misinformation can spread when we don’t take the time to fact-check or think critically about what we’re reading.

So, buckle up, buttercup. We’re about to embark on a journey through the smoke and mirrors of this faux study. We’ll dissect how it managed to fool so many, explore the red flags that give away its satirical nature, and discuss the broader implications for how we consume and share information.

By the end of this article, you’ll be equipped with the tools to spot similar bull… err, misinformation in the wild. And who knows? You might even have a good laugh along the way. After all, if we can’t chuckle at the absurdity of a study claiming weed makes your johnson grow, what can we laugh at?

Let’s dive in and separate fact from fiction, shall we?

At first glance, “The Perceived Effect of Cannabis Use on Penile Growth in Humans” appears to be a bona fide scientific study. It’s got all the trappings of legitimacy: a roster of authors from various universities, a proper abstract, and formatting that would make any academic journal proud. The study even sports an impressive list of references, making it seem like a well-researched piece of scholarship.

The authors’ affiliations read like a Who’s Who of obscure yet official-sounding institutions. From the “Santo Daime Ayahuasca University” to the “Central University of Michigan Medical Phecomagnetism,” these names carry just enough gravitas to make a casual reader nod along. And let’s not forget the cherry on top – the presence of W.T. Gerbil and R.T. Gerbil from the prestigious “Siberian University of Independent Gerbids.” Who wouldn’t trust a gerbil with their penile growth research?

The study’s use of scientific jargon is particularly convincing. Take this gem, for instance: “Recent studies have suggested that cannabis may influence human penile growth through the activation of specific receptors in the body. The active compounds in cannabis, known as cannabinoids, have been found to bind to receptors in the body known as CB1 and CB2, which are responsible for regulating cell growth and differentiation” [6]. It sounds plausible, doesn’t it? The casual mention of CB1 and CB2 receptors lends an air of scientific credibility that’s hard to dismiss outright.

The paper even goes so far as to discuss the ethical considerations of their research, stating, “The ethical considerations of the survey were addressed through a thorough review and approval process by an institutional review board (IRB) or ethics committee.” This attention to ethical protocols further sells the illusion of a legitimate study.

Perhaps the most compelling aspect of this satirical masterpiece is its presentation of “results.” The authors claim, “The survey results of the sample of 10,000 men aged 18-35 suggest that most participants, approximately 60%, think that cannabis use helped increase the size of their penis.” They even throw in a p-value for good measure: “Results show that individuals with a higher education level were significantly more likely to claim that cannabis increased their penis size compared to those with a lower education level (p < 0.05).”

The study’s placement on a legitimate-looking website, Clinmedjournals.org, is the final touch that sells this fraud completely. The site’s professional design and the presence of other seemingly legitimate studies create a context of credibility that makes it easy to accept this study at face value.

In crafting this elaborate hoax, the authors have demonstrated a keen understanding of how scientific papers are structured and presented. They’ve mimicked the language, format, and conventions of genuine research so effectively that it’s easy to see how readers might be fooled, especially if they’re only skimming or if they lack familiarity with scientific literature.

This level of detail and commitment to the bit raises an intriguing possibility: could the authors be real researchers conducting a meta-experiment on information consumption and critical thinking in the digital age? Regardless of their true identities or motivations, they’ve certainly succeeded in creating a compelling facsimile of a scientific study.

As we peel back the layers of this satirical onion, it becomes clear just how skilfully crafted this deception is. But fear not, dear readers. In our next section, we’ll dive into the red flags that give away this study’s true nature, arming you with the tools to spot similar falsehoods in the wild.

Let’s pull back the curtain on this elaborate ruse and expose the dead giveaways that scream, “This is satire!” Trust me, I nearly fell for it myself, but once you see these red flags, you’ll wonder how anyone could have missed them.

First up, let’s talk about those “prestigious” universities. At first glance, they might sound legit, but take a closer look:

Santo Daime Ayahuasca University, Spain

Tanned Balls University, Spain

Central University of Charlatanery of Cochabamba, Spain

New Caledonia Junk Products Sales University, Spain

Siberian University of Independent Gerbids, Spain

Central University of Michigan Medical Phecomagnetism, Spain

Notice anything odd? Besides the fact that apparently every obscure university is located in Spain, we’ve got gems like “Tanned Balls University” and the “Siberian University of Independent Gerbids.” I don’t know about you, but I’ve never met a gerbil with a PhD.

The conclusion section is where the satirical nature of this “study” really shines. It starts off sounding somewhat plausible, but quickly descends into absurdity. The authors claim, “It appears that paying drug dealers with Dragon Ball cards may also have an impact on these findings.” I’m sorry, what? Unless Goku has some hidden penis-enlarging powers we don’t know about, this is clearly nonsense.

But wait, there’s more! The study casually mentions that 16.5% of subjects reported that cannabis not only made their penis grow but also their nose. Pinocchio, is that you?

The consumption methods reported in the study are equally ridiculous. Apparently, 78.2% of subjects preferred “smoking cigarettes mixed with carrots.” I don’t know about you, but I’ve never seen anyone light up a carrot.

Perhaps the most glaring example of satire is in the statistical analysis. The authors claim to have used “TannedBallsComputer® SPSS, version 111.0” for their analysis. I hate to break it to you, but that’s not a real software package.

I have to admit, when I first came across this study, I was ready to write an article about its findings. The title was catchy, the abstract seemed plausible, and hey, who doesn’t love a good story about unexpected benefits from cannabis use? It wasn’t until I dug deeper that I realized I was being played like a fiddle. That’s when I decided to pivot and write about the hoax itself instead.

This experience serves as a humbling reminder of how easy it is to be fooled by something that looks legitimate at first glance. It’s a testament to the power of presentation and the importance of critical reading. Even as someone who prides myself on being skeptical and analytical, I nearly fell for it. It just goes to show that we all need to stay on our toes when consuming information, especially in this age of clickbait and misinformation.

In our next segment, we’ll look at some publications that weren’t as lucky as I was. These folks took the bait hook, line, and sinker, republishing the “findings” as legitimate science. It’s a sobering reminder of how easily false information can spread when we don’t take the time to fact-check and think critically.

It seems our satirical study on cannabis and penile growth has made quite a splash in certain corners of the internet. Let’s take a closer look at some of the publications that took the bait, hook, line, and sinker.

First up, we have “Advances in Medical, Dental and Health Sciences,” a seemingly reputable journal that proudly displays the study’s title and even quotes one of its more sensational findings. The fact that a publication with “Medical” and “Health Sciences” in its name couldn’t spot this obvious satire is, quite frankly, alarming. It makes you wonder about the rigor of their peer-review process, doesn’t it?

Next, we see ResearchGate, a platform widely used by academics and researchers, hosting this study. While ResearchGate itself isn’t vouching for the study’s validity, its presence on the site lends it an air of legitimacy that it absolutely doesn’t deserve. This highlights the potential dangers of platforms that allow easy sharing of “research” without robust fact-checking mechanisms.

Perhaps most concerning is Kannabia, a cannabis-focused blog that not only fell for the study but ran with it, asking the provocative question, “Does marijuana make your penis bigger?” This is a prime example of how misinformation can spread when it aligns with what people want to hear or believe.

While fortunately, the number of publications that fell for this hoax seems limited, the fact that any did is cause for concern. It raises serious questions about the standards of these outlets and their commitment to fact-checking and critical analysis.

In my view, this “study” serves as a brilliant experiment in how misinformation works. It demonstrates how easily sensationalist claims about hot-button topics can be adopted and spread, especially when they align with existing biases or desires. The cannabis community, always eager for positive news about their favorite plant, seems particularly susceptible to this kind of misinformation.

This incident serves as a stark reminder of why we must always wear our critical thinking caps, especially in the age of AI. With tools like GPT-3 and DALL-E, creating convincing fake studies, complete with plausible-sounding methodologies and conclusions, is easier than ever. If I wanted to, I could craft a “study” on the effects of cannabis on breast size tomorrow, complete with fake university affiliations and sciency-sounding jargon. And I guarantee you, someone, somewhere would pick it up and run with it as fact.

The ease with which this misinformation spreads is a testament to the power of confirmation bias. People are more likely to believe and share information that confirms their existing beliefs or desires, often without taking the time to verify its authenticity.

So, dear readers, consider this a wake-up call. Be aware of the content you consume, for not all that glitters is gold – or in this case, not all that claims to make your johnson grow is legit. Question everything, especially if it seems too good (or too outrageous) to be true.

This is why we need to be vigilant, critical, and always ready to dig deeper. In a world where fake news can spread faster than you can say “cannabis-induced penile growth,” it’s up to each of us to be the gatekeepers of truth. Stay skeptical, my friends, and remember – if it sounds too good to be true, it probably is.