Cannabis News
How Much Weed Do Hobbits Smoke in the Shire in One Day?
The Average Day of a Stoner Hobbit in the Shire
I’d like to preface this article with the caution to “not try this”, even though, I know that by the mere existence of this article some of you might make a challenge out of it. I know I wouldn’t if I was a younger stoner.
Nonetheless, I did find this to be something fresh and out of the ordinary to work on, and so, I will help this meme gain some wings
So what am I talking about?
While I was doing my typical research to provide you all with fine material such as this, I stumbled upon one user’s submission to the Subreddit R/Trees. Essentially, the OP prompted ChatGPT to come up with a “weed smoking schedule” in accordance with the “eating schedule” of the fictional Tolkien Hobbits.
The result was a daunting mountain of stoned-ness that would have inspired my younger self to try to attempt it. These days, I have too many responsibilities to simply gift a day to cannabis in such excess, however, I know there’s going to be a stoner out there one summer, in their home with nothing better to do than get stoned.
So for that bored stoner, that has nothing planned and would like to test the depth of their tolerance to weed, I introduce to you the “Hobbit Stoning Schedule.
As you can see, this is a “whole day event” and if you would like to take it to the next level, you should be watching the whole Lord of the Rings Series as you attempt this quest. I guess you could decide whether you’d watch LOTR, or The Hobbit movies…but that is not necessarily needed to complete the challenge. Dressing as a Hobbit is optional!
I say, all you need to do to successfully achieve your “Hobbit Smoking Badge”, you simply have to follow the schedule posted above.
And to help you get into the spirit of it all, I created this fictional account of a Hobbit named “Bongbo Baggies” who will help you understand the way of the hobbit!
In the charming villages of the Shire lived a tribe of hobbits particularly fond of the pipeweed grown in their sunny fields. Foremost among them was old Bongbo Baggies, an elder stoner revered for his mighty lungs and enthusiastic consumption of the sweet leaf.
One morning as the Sun peered over the hills of Buckland, Bongbo awoke, eager to begin his day in the time-honored hobbit fashion. Reaching for his trusty wizard bong Gandalf the Green, he packed a fresh bowl of Hairy Took kush and took a mighty rip, holding it in to savor the flavor.
After exhaling a ring of smoke, Bongbo felt ready for second breakfast. He headed to the kitchen to vape a sativa cartridge while cooking some toasted croissants dripping with honey. The terpenes opened his appetite and banished any sluggishness.
Soon elevenses arrived, the hour of eating and smoking between breakfast and luncheon. Bongbo whipped up a batch of cannabis-infused smoothies, blending together fruit, juice, yogurt, and a hearty sprinkle of ground indica bud. This infused his body and mind with calm vibrations.
By noon Bongbo was ready for a snack to carry him to luncheon. He ate fresh figs and apricots from the market while ingesting an edible, feeling their energies synergize. An uplifted euphoria flowed through him, mingling with the sounds of nature.
When midday hunger arrived, Bongbo sat down to a luncheon of mushroom pie baked lovingly by his dear cousin Tooky. Alongside it he sipped a ginger tincture infused with wizard-grown cannabinoids. The pie and tincture combined to send his spirit soaring on clouds of joy.
In the afternoon Bongbo met up with friends at the Green Dragon Inn, a legendary hobbit hotbox. They passed around Old Toby and shared laughed until Bongbo’s belly began to rumble. He excused himself for afternoon tea.
At home awaited scones clotted with cream and tart raspberry jam. Bongbo toasted them while taking hits from his Gandalf bong. Sweet, buttery flavors danced on his tongue as the Flower of the Westfast haze flowered in his mind.
By supper Bongbo was flying high, ready to feast. He cooked an elaborate meal of roast chicken glazed with a kushy herb butter. Alongside were roasted autumn vegetables and fluffy biscuits. Bongbo poured a deep cabernet infused with indica to complement the savory dishes.
Full from the hearty fare, Bongbo retired to his armchair, packing a fresh bowl in his intricately carved willow-wood pipe. He blew smoke rings above his head, watching them turn into little dancing elves and gnomes frolicking in the air.
But when the clock struck eight, Bongbo’s appetite was rekindled. A spread of pot brownies topped with vanilla ice cream sounded just right. He devoured the delicious edibles, licking the plate clean. A deep sense of wellness washed over Bongbo as he rubbed his full belly, soon to be asleep and dreaming.
And so ended a perfect day for this contented Halfling. His kin may have called him a stoner, but through the bounty of the Shire, cannabis brought communion, camaraderie, and childlike wonder back into his life. Bongbo wouldn’t have had it any other way. There were few troubles that the plant’s graces could not wash away.
Things to Remember:
If you’re going to attempt this insanity, let’s walk you down through some of the things to look out for. After all, this is a Hobbit schedule, no mere human could follow in the mighty footsteps of Bonbo.
Firstly, if you were to attempt this, I highly encourage doing a trial run where you literally just take small doses. This is going to accumulate and odds are that you’ll either at one point get tired and fall asleep, or the weed might just become a singular long deep body high that will get you couch locked for most of the day.
Therefore, pace yourself. This is a marathon, not a sprint. For example, just take a small hit of the vape when you wake and bake. Make the edibles a bit weaker…which brings me to my next point.
Prepare your stuff ahead of the time. Speaking from experience, when you get to a certain point – you don’t really want to be cooking. Therefore, I highly recommend preparing your hobbit meal ahead of the time. This will allow you to simply go through the experience without needing to worry about prepping anything.
This includes your space. Odds are that you’re going to want to hunker down in a particular spot. Therefore, prepare rooms, water, etc. Anything you’ll need to deal with whatever comes your way. For example, “a dark room” could be a perfect place to mellow out a deep brownie high. You just got to have some soft pillows, relaxing music – fresh air…and you can trip there for a few hours in between toking sessions.
Furthermore, I highly recommend putting the smoking sessions on a pre-determined alarm schedule. You want your phone to tell you what time it is. This will help you keep track of the process since being stoned can make your time perception go a bit wonky. You might think hours have gone by, when in fact mere minutes turtled forward.
Do not do this if this is your first time. You’ll be bound to green out and will probably not want to try weed again. This is a challenge for seasoned stoners. You should have already have eaten edibles on a few occasions, you should already have dabbed.
If you’re fresh to cannabis – this will in all likeliness knock you out. Even seasoned stoners know that the proposed challenge is heavy and it’s not something that should be taken lightly. You’re going to get REALLY high, so be prepared for that.
If shit gets too whacky for you, you won’t be able to “stop”, you’ll have to ride it out. Typically, novices panic pre-peak, meaning, they want to “get off the ride” but the ride hasn’t reached the zenith yet. In these cases, go to the dark room, remove as much stimuli as possible, and focus in on your breathing.
I wrote extensive guides on Greening out, you should read that prior to attempting this crazy shit. This also means that you don’t want to have newbies with you if you’re going to attempt this. You want stoners that know how to handle their shit, that know their own limits, that understand what they are attempting.
I would also have some CBD on hand. If you get really stoned, you can use a few drops in a tincture to level out the high. However, you’re going to also want to learn how to do some basic calming breathing techniques. It’s probably one of your best weapons when you’re faced with a “OMFG” moment.
Just inhale for four seconds, and exhale for six…and keep this rhythm while only focusing on how the air goes in and out. Whatever thoughts that are happening in your head are typically not your own, just your conscious mind tripping the hell out.
If you follow these suggestions, you should in all likeliness be able to get through the session and become an honorary stoner hobbit. It could also be a great way to do 420 with your friends. Of course, always be safe and cautious when consuming anything.
This challenge is something that I would not attempt myself, but I think that there would be some stoners who would find this appealing. If I’m going out of commission for a day, I’d prefer 2-3 hits of acid or 5-7 grams of mushrooms and take a plunge into the strange. But that’s me.
For those who will attempt this, let me know in the comments wherever you read this. Maybe you can meet up with some fellow hobbits and make a thing of it!
A WEED SCHEDULE OR JOURNAL, READ ON…
“How Long Does One Puff of Weed Stay in Your System?”… This topic can be difficult to answer since it is dependent on elements such as the size of the hit and what constitutes a “one hit.” If you take a large bong pull then cough, it might linger in your system for 5-7 days. A moderate dose from a joint can last 3-5 days, whereas a few hits from a vaporizer may last 1-3 days.
The length of time that marijuana stays in the body varies based on a number of factors, including metabolism, THC levels, frequency of use, and hydration.
Delta-9-tetrahydrocannabinol, or THC, is the primary psychoactive component of cannabis. THC and its metabolites, which remain in your body long after the effects have subsided, are detected by drug tests.
Since these metabolites are fat-soluble, they cling to bodily fat molecules. They could thus take a while to fully pass through your system, particularly if your body fat percentage is higher.
THC is absorbed by tissues and organs (including the brain, heart, and fat) and converted by the liver into chemicals such as 11-hydroxy-THC and carboxy-THC. Cannabis is eliminated in feces at a rate of around 65%, while urine accounts for 20%. The leftover amount might be kept within the body.
THC deposited in bodily tissues ultimately re-enters the circulation and is processed by the liver. For frequent users, THC accumulates in fatty tissues quicker than it can be removed, thus it may be detectable in drug tests for days or weeks following consumption.
The detection time varies according to the amount and frequency of cannabis usage. Higher dosages and regular usage result in longer detection times.
The type of drug test also affects detection windows. Blood and saliva tests typically detect cannabis metabolites for shorter periods, while urine and hair samples can reveal use for weeks or even months. In some cases, hair tests have detected cannabis use over 90 days after consumption.
Detection Windows for Various Cannabis Drug Tests
Urine Tests
Among all drug tests, urine testing is the most commonly used method for screening for drug use in an individual.
Detection times vary, but a 2017 review suggests the following windows for cannabis in urine after last use:
– Single-use (e.g., one joint): up to 3 days
– Moderate use (around 4 times a week): 5–7 days
– Chronic use (daily): 10–15 days
– Chronic heavy use (multiple times daily): over 30 days
Blood Tests
Blood tests generally detect recent cannabis use, typically within 2–12 hours after consumption. However, in cases of heavy use, cannabis has been detected up to 30 days later. Chronic heavy use can extend the detection period in the bloodstream.
Saliva Tests
THC can enter saliva through secondhand cannabis smoke, but THC metabolites are only present if you’ve personally smoked or ingested cannabis.
Saliva testing has a short detection window and can sometimes identify cannabis use on the same day. A 2020 review found that THC was detectable in the saliva of frequent users for up to 72 hours after use, and it may remain in saliva longer than in blood following recent use.
In areas where cannabis is illegal, saliva testing is often used for roadside screenings.
Hair Tests
Hair follicle tests can detect cannabis use for up to 90 days. After use, cannabinoids reach the hair follicles through small blood vessels and from sebum and sweat surrounding the hair.
Hair grows at approximately 0.5 inches per month, so a 1.5-inch segment of hair close to the scalp can reveal cannabis use over the past three months.
Factors Affecting THC and Metabolite Retention
The length of time THC and its metabolites stay in your system depends on various factors. Some, like body mass index (BMI) and metabolic rate, relate to individual body processing, not the drug itself.
Other factors are specific to cannabis use, including:
– Dosage: How much you consume
– Frequency: How often you use cannabis
– Method of consumption: Smoking, dabbing, edibles, or sublingual
– THC potency: Higher potency can extend detection time
Higher doses and more frequent use generally extend THC retention. Cannabis consumed orally may remain in the system slightly longer than smoked cannabis, and stronger cannabis strains, higher in THC, may also stay detectable for a longer period.
How Quickly Do the Effects of Cannabis Set In?
When smoking cannabis, effects appear almost immediately, while ingested cannabis may take 1–3 hours to peak.
The psychoactive component THC produces a “high” with common effects such as:
– Altered senses, including perception of time
– Mood changes
– Difficulty with thinking and problem-solving
– Impaired memory
Other short-term effects can include:
– Anxiety and confusion
– Decreased coordination
– Dry mouth and eyes
– Nausea or lightheadedness
– Trouble focusing
– Increased appetite
– Rapid heart rate
– Restlessness and sleepiness
In rare cases, high doses may lead to hallucinations, delusions, or acute psychosis.
Regular cannabis use may have additional mental and physical effects. While research is ongoing, cannabis use may increase the risk of:
– Cognitive issues like memory loss
– Cardiovascular problems including heart disease and stroke
– Respiratory illnesses such as bronchitis or lung infections
– Mood disorders like depression and anxiety
Cannabis use during pregnancy can negatively impact fetal growth and development.
Duration of Effects
Short-term effects generally taper off within 1–3 hours, but for chronic users, some long-term effects may last days, weeks, or even months. Certain effects may even be permanent.
Bottom Line
The amount of time that cannabis remains in your system following a single use varies greatly depending on individual characteristics such as body fat, metabolism, frequency of use, and mode of intake. Frequent users may maintain traces of THC for weeks, whereas infrequent users may test positive for as little as a few days. Hair tests can disclose usage for up to 90 days, while blood and saliva tests identify more recent use. Urine tests are the most popular and have varying detection durations. The duration that THC and its metabolites are detectable will ultimately depend on a number of factors, including dose, strength, and individual body chemistry.
PEE IN A CUP COMING UP, READ ON..
Is kratom addictive? Discover the potential for dependence on Kratom, the risks involved with its use, and how to approach its consumption responsibly.
From 2011 to 2017, over 1,800 calls to poison centers involved kratom in the U.S. This significant number highlights the concern regarding kratom addiction.
However, without Food and Drug Administration (FDA) oversight, and due to various consumption methods like teas and capsules, there are significant health risks. Safe use of kratom is now in question due to these issues.
Research debates how dependence develops, outlining signs like loss of control and withdrawal symptoms. These signs are seen in regular kratom users. Ironically, some people switch from drugs like heroin to kratom, looking for a legal alternative.
Understanding Kratom: Origins and Prevalence
Kratom comes from the Mitragyna speciosa tree in Southeast Asia. It can act like a stimulant or like opioids, based on how much you take. People use it in different ways, for a small energy boost or stronger effects at higher doses.
The legal status of kratom in the U.S. is complicated and changing. It’s a hot topic because some worry about its misuse. It’s still legal in several states. This shows how different places handle drug rules. The National Institute on Drug Abuse is looking into its medical benefits. But, the FDA hasn’t approved it for medical use yet. The DEA calls it a “drug of concern,” which means policies might change.
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From 2011 to 2017, poison control centers in the U.S. got over 1,800 reports about kratom. This shows it’s widely used and might pose health risks.
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Kratom’s main ingredients bind to opioid receptors very strongly, stronger than morphine even. This fact is key to understanding its effects.
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As more people use kratom, more are reporting serious health problems. These include liver and heart issues, and tough withdrawal symptoms, particularly in those already sick.
The statistics show mounting worries about kratom in the U.S. As its use grows, it’s becoming more important to health policies and laws. What happens next will depend on further research and legal decisions.
Is Kratom Addictive: Investigating the Substance’s Nature
The question of kratom’s addictiveness focuses on how it affects brain receptors and its long-term health implications. The ongoing debate highlights concerns about dependence and the risk of addiction. Scientists are closely looking at these issues.
How Kratom Works in the Brain
Kratom’s main alkaloids, mitragynine and 7-hydroxymitragynine, bind to the brain’s opioid receptors, similar to painkillers and narcotics. This connection suggests a potential risk of dependence. These alkaloids are key to kratom’s pain relief but also point to possible addiction concerns, especially with frequent, high-dose usage.
Patterns and Consequences of Long-term Use
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Using kratom often, especially in large doses, can increase the risk of dependence and intense withdrawal symptoms, similar to opioid withdrawal.
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Although some use it for pain or to improve mood, long-term kratom users might see serious health problems, like liver damage and mental health issues.
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Withdrawal symptoms, including irritability, nausea, and sleep problems, show kratom’s impact on one’s physical and mental health.
Assessment of Addiction Risks
Studies indicate a significant risk of addiction to kratom, especially with high doses or frequent use. Dependence develops as the body gets used to kratom, leading to tolerance and a need for more to feel its effects. Withdrawal symptoms emphasize this risk, as highlighted by health experts.
Physiological Effects: Kratom’s Impact on the Body
There is a lot of debate about the safety and use of kratom. This herbal extract comes from the Mitragyna speciosa plant. It has drawn attention for its possible harmful effects on the body. The FDA has issued many warnings about kratom, raising safety concerns.
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Kratom Adverse Effects: Kratom users have reported side effects like nausea, vomiting, and confusion. More serious issues include high blood pressure and liver damage. These problems highlight the risks of using kratom.
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Herbal Extract Safety: Some kratom products contain heavy metals and pathogens. These can cause severe health issues, including death. This shows the importance of safety in herbal products.
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FDA Warnings and Regulations: The FDA has linked kratom to over 35 deaths and warns against using it. They point out the lack of medical uses and the risk of addiction.
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Physiological Impact: Kratom’s effects depend on the dose and the user’s body. Yet, it can lead to dangerous outcomes like liver damage and seizures.
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Safety Concerns from Authorities: Federal agencies like the DEA are worried about kratom’s safety. Although not a controlled substance, monitoring suggests users should be careful.
Kratom might offer temporary relief for some ailments, but it comes with significant risks. The FDA’s warnings should make people think twice. If considering kratom, it’s crucial to talk to a doctor first. Experts stress the need for safety and caution with herbal extracts.
Conclusion
Kratom’s role in health and regulation is complex, with views and research findings widely varied. Some people use kratom for its claimed health benefits, but it’s a hot topic. Experts advise caution and suggest consulting a doctor before using kratom due to the unclear effects.
Clinical studies using scores like SOWS and COWS haven’t confirmed withdrawal symptoms from kratom. This adds to the debate, especially when some users report withdrawal. This makes kratom a controversial subject among different findings and user experiences.
When it comes to treating opioid addiction, kratom can be both helpful and harmful. Some have used it successfully to fight addiction. Yet, some states have banned it. This highlights the need for regulations and consistent product quality. It also raises questions about kratom’s legal status due to mixed actions by authorities.
The situation shows how complex kratom is in the realm of substance use and law. Without clear evidence supporting either its benefits or risks, it poses a challenge. More research is needed to guide regulations and health advice. For now, anyone thinking of using kratom should be careful, seek medical advice, and keep up with laws and health guidelines.
WHAT IS KRATOM ANYWAY? READ ON…
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