Cannabis News
Out-Smoking Death or the Devil’s Bong
Oftentimes on Twitter or any social media platform for that matter, you’ll find people complaining about shows or books they didn’t like. While I believe everyone is definitely entitled to their opinions, I find the mantra of “creating that what you want to see” as a better approach to life.
Instead of wasting time on complaining about the “state of entertainment” – which in all fairness is in a dismal state – I propose that we, the stoner creative community of the world, band together to create epic “open source fiction” which can be over the top, crazy, entertaining – etc.
With A.I tools, we have the ability to create characters, edit storylines, make videos, all with just a bit of time and a whole lot of weed!
Therefore, it is my hope that this article plants a seed of inspiration in the minds of the right creatives. Consider this a “side quest creative challenge” where you can add to a storyline and help create a universe, comic book, artwork – whatever you feel like doing.
I by nature am a writer, therefore – I have a million ideas always bouncing in my head. This is why I decided to gift the world a few plotlines that I probably won’t use any time soon. You can use the plot line, create characters, etc – using the story and I will consider it part of the core universe of the plot.
I think there’s some good stuff here – and so I took the liberty of creating a mockup of each story just to add a bit more flare and weight to the creative prompt.
The truth of the matter is that we live in an age where we can easily create new things – our biggest problem is getting inspiration or ideas. Well, to help you with that – here’s five stoner related spooky stories you can use as inspiration.
Pick one…and let me see what you got!
When Bill first noticed the tiny red bugs swarming his prized Purple Haze plants, he assumed they were regular spider mites. He tried the usual remedies – neem oil, ladybugs, pyrethrins – but nothing could seem to fully eradicate them.
Strange behaviors started soon after. Plants with the heaviest mite infestations grew rapidly, almost overnight becoming the biggest, stickiest, most crystal-laden buds Bill had ever grown. Their dank stench was strangely enticing yet alien.
Bill knew he should destroy the mutant plants. But their frosty, dense nugs mesmerized him. He trimmed a sample, sparking a test joint. The instant the smoke hit, his mind expanded as if a hidden realm of cosmic truth was revealed. Surely one more harvest couldn’t hurt…
Over the following weeks, Bill spent every waking moment tending to his new “pets.” They instructed him telepathically, somehow communicating through the very plants they inhabited. He barely slept, eating only what the mites required.
Finally the day came when he was no longer needed. Bill gazed in resigned horror as a human-sized cocoon took shape, pulsing with unearthly sounds. A thick tendril wrapped around him, drawing him closer as he screamed helplessly. Soon, the thing inside would feed…and absorb his nutrient-rich remains.
The Spider Mites from the Stygian Void were well fed. And with the hive knowledge of the clone replicating their host, their domination of Earth could begin…
Dr. Jamison could barely contain his excitement examining the vintage cannabis seeds. Previously unknown genetics – a priceless treasure! He extracted trace DNA and fused it with modern strains. The result after months of cultivation shocked him.
Buds of unusual hues and patterns emerged, emitting an oddly enticing odor almost more akin to orchids than cannabis. Their cannabinoid profile was entirely unique. This was a Nobel-worthy botanical breakthrough!
Despite odd mutations, Dr. Jamison deemed it safe and finally sampled his hybrid. The experience was transcendent – deeper insights into nature and his own mind poured forth. Surely this cannabis could change the world!
But over following weeks, Jamison felt…different. Blackouts and lost time became common. Often he’d awaken covered in strange fluids, no memory of the night before. His temper simmered, like a caged animal seeking release.
The truth became apparent when he found a mangled drifter in his lab, ripped limb from limb. Surveillance footage showed the thing that did it had his face, but moved with vicious predatory purpose no human could replicate.
Destroying the remaining hybrid seeds brought no relief from the haunting emptiness inside Dr. Jamison. He knew now that the relic DNA had mutated more than the plant. It had infected his very genetic code, trapping his consciousness within the demonstrates what is released each time the ancient cannabis recycled his suppressed primal instincts. It could never be caged again…
It started small – free joints at concerts and events that seemed normal enough. But the corporate sponsors never revealed what made their cannabis so addictive, or the true motives behind their giveaways.
Within months, overdose deaths skyrocketed as “Zombie Weed” spread. Yet even as their minds deteriorated, addicts couldn’t stop compulsively smoking it.
When the CEO did a press conference feigning ignorance, no one noticed his fangs protruding or reptilian eyes thanks to advanced makeup. The secret Big Pharma strain was working perfectly to create a nation of the sickly and compliant.
But then the mutations began showing in the hardest junkies. Unusual appetites for raw meat. Primal urges dulled by society now roaring back. Within a year, the zombified horde had overrun all containment efforts and Survivors took shelter, trying to endure a world ruled by the animal hunger of those transformed into literal zombie cannibals – all seeded by corporate greed weaponizing cannabis against the masses.
However, one neuroscientist named Dr. Hara may have found a cure – a rare terpene with pacifying effects. But motivating the profit-crazed Big Pharma CEO to distribute it would take nothing short of a miracle…or perhaps the motivational bite of a reanimated zombie!
Outsmoking Death
Jeremy couldn’t believe his luck stumbling upon the ancient clay bong in an abandoned temple. A relic from an ancient cannabis cult, its etched name “Thanatopsis” gave warning. But foolish Jeremy still took a mighty rip from the ancient bowl as the clock struck midnight on his 30th birthday.
As he held in the magical smoke, the temperature plummeted. Jeremy exhaled to see a foreboding robed figure sitting across from him. In a chilling voice it spoke “I am Death, and you have summoned me. But I shall be merciful and offer you a chance few receive – best me in three contests of your choosing, and I shall grant you extended life.”
Having nothing to lose, Jeremy accepted. He chose hot boxing, dab rips, and best strain as their competitions. Death agreed indifferently, sparking a spectral doobie aflame with blue fire indicating his first defeat. And so it continued over the years – Jeremy outsmoking Death in every challenge imaginable, from bong hits to infused meals. His skill grew as his body ceased to age under Death’s blessing.
Until 5000 years later, Death claimed the third victory. But Jeremy felt only serenity, having lived more lifetimes than he could count. As Death ferried him into the great beyond, Jeremy finally understood – Death was no enemy, but a friend guiding his soul’s journey to its ultimate destination.
The Devil’s Bong
The five teens should have known their discovery was too good to be true. Finding a huge demonic horn in the old abandoned cottage, they fashioned it into the most epic bong ever. Little did they know the cursed object held an ancient evil since the dawn of man.
That fateful midnight toke unleashed the apocalyptic forces contained within. Ghastly arms burst from the floorboards, demonic creatures descended shrieking. The kids screamed as blood-red smoke flowed from the horn, twisting their forms into deadites – possessed zombie-like shells of their former selves.
In the chaos, geeky Simon had a revelation – the only way to close the portal was to smoke the remaining devil weed before sunrise! He rallied his monstrous friends for one last mission. They holed up and sparked the sinister stash as fast as inhumanly possible while fighting off hordes of hellspawn.
With rooster’s first crow, Simon exhaled the final demonic cloud as his friends returned to human form. The portal slammed shut, sealing away the ancient evil. They had survived a night of pure bong ripping horror!
While relishing their victory, little did the carefree teens know the dangers ahead if the portal ever reopened. For if the demons ruled earth for even one day, they would establish the Council of Karens to enforce their strict taboos for all eternity! Truly, a fate worse than hell…
The Sticky Bottom Line
I think these stories can keep a few of you entertained. If you do decide to create anything, just link it back to this article. Why? Because I want other people to create chapters, episodes, characters, songs…whatever the hell you want.
Use AI, do it yourself, write some BS and add to the whole universe. I think I’ve provided you with enough incentive to do something fun. So go ahead…let’s make some art together!
SPOOKY CANNABIS-THEMED HALLOWEEN COSTUMES, READ ON…
