The Best Cannabis Christmas Carols?

Reginald Reefer’s Kushmas Carols Pt 2

 

A few years ago, I wrote a parody of “A Christmas Carol”, which I entitled “Twas the Night before Kushmas” and I even made a video about it. In the spirit of Kushmas, I have decided to rework a number of your favorite Christmas poems and carols, with the Kushmas treatment.

 

Hell, I may even Publish this as a book. Who knows!

 

Anyhow, since we’re almost at that time of the year when we feast, hang out with family, and open presents, here’s some Kushmas spirit for your pipes!

 

 

Rolling through the town

In my low rider sleigh

O’er the hills we go

Smoking all the way

 

Single Bowls, Single Bowls

Smell them all the way

Oh what fun it is ride this lifted way, hey!

 

Single Bowls, Smelly Bowls

Smell them all the way

A winter wonderland

With my buds today, hey!

 

Smoking as we ride

And taking puffs of glee

Through the frosted towns

While as high as can be

 

Oh, Single Bowls, Single Bowls

Smell them all the way

What fun it is to toke and sing this way, hey!

 

Single Bowls, Single Bowls!

Smell them all the way

A wonderland of green

On this cheery day, hey!

 

 

On the first day of Kushmas, my dealer gave to me

A fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the second day of Kushmas, my dealer gave to me

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the third day of Kushmas my dealer gave to me

Three pipes a-smoking

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the fourth day of Kushmas my dealer gave to me

Four edibles baking

Three pipes a-smoking

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the fifth day of Kushmas my dealer gave to me

Five golden vapes

Four edibles baking

Three pipes a-smoking

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the sixth day of Kushmas my dealer gave to me

Six bowls a-packing

Five golden vapes

Four edibles baking

Three pipes a-smoking

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the seventh day of Kushmas my dealer gave to me

Seven nugs a-drying

Six bowls a-packing

Five golden vapes

Four edibles baking

Three pipes a-smoking

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the eighth day of Kushmas my dealer gave to me

Eight blunts a-rolling

Seven nugs a-drying

Six bowls a-packing

Five golden vapes

Four edibles baking

Three pipes a-smoking

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the ninth day of Kushmas my dealer gave to me

Nine plants a-growing

Eight blunts a-rolling

 

Seven nugs a-drying

Six bowls a-packing

Five golden vapes

Four edibles baking

 

Three pipes a-smoking

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the tenth day of Kushmas my dealer gave to me

 

Ten new strains

Nine plants a-growing

Eight blunts a-rolling

 

Seven nugs a-drying

Six bowls a-packing

Five golden vapes

Four edibles baking

Three pipes a-smoking

 

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the eleventh day of Kushmas my dealer gave to me

Eleven hash oils dripping

 

Ten new strains

Nine plants a-growing

Eight blunts a-rolling

 

Seven nugs a-drying

Six bowls a-packing

Five golden vapes

Four edibles baking

Three pipes a-smoking

 

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed

 

On the twelfth day of Kushmas my dealer gave to me

Twelve seeds for growing

Eleven hash oils dripping

Ten new strains

 

Nine plants a-growing

Eight blunts a-rolling

 

Seven nugs a-drying

Six bowls a-packing

 

Five golden vapes

 

Four edibles baking

Three pipes a-smoking

 

Two joints a-puffing

And a fat ounce of sour diesel weed!

 

 

Oh, you better watch out

 

You better not cry

You better not pout

I’m telling you why

Ganja Claus is coming to town

 

He’s making a list

He’s checking it twice

 

Gonna find out who’s naughty or nice

Ganja Claus is coming to town

 

He sees you when you’re toking

He knows when you bake

 

He knows when you’ve got the good kush

So be good for goodness sake

 

Oh, you better watch out

You better not cry

You better not pout

I’m telling you why

Ganja Claus is coming to town

 

With empty sacks and a loaded bowl

And strains from the North Pole

Ganja Claus is coming to town

 

He’s got Moon Rocks for good girls and boys

Bringing green cannabis joy

So toke how you like and smoke up the night

 

Ganja Claus is coming to town

 

 

Frosty the Dopeman was a chill and happy soul

With a corn cob pipe and two eyes made of bowls

And two nugs made out of hash

 

Frosty the Dopeman is a fairytale they say

He was made of snow but he loved to toke all day

There must have been some magic in that silk stash they found

 

For when they placed it on his head

He began to dance around

Frosty the Dopeman

Was as lit as he could be

And everybody toking

Is totally jealous of me

 

Thumpety thump thump

Thumpety thump thump

Look at Frosty go

Thumpety thump thump

Thumpety thump thump

To the cannabis store

 

Frosty the Dopeman knew it’s risky business outside

So he stayed in to burn and get super fried

He locked the doors and shut the blinds

And kept on smoking dooby pines

 

With his stash of bud so tight

And his green glowing bright

Frosty the Dopeman is getting high all night

 

Thumpety thump thump

Thumpety thump thump

Just hear him laugh

Thumpety thump thump

Thumpety thump thump

He’s chiefing his hash

 

 

I’m dreaming of a green Christmas

 

Just like the ones from Amsterdam

Where the bud tends to glisten

 

And stoners listen

To hear dank nugs crisping in the pan

 

I’m dreaming of a green Christmas

With every doobie I toke

Where the glass bongs glisten

 

And the vapes all shine so bright

 

I’m dreaming of a green Christmas

With every tasty puff I take

May your strains be purple and bright

And may all your Kushmas be white

 

I’m dreaming of a green Christmas

With a half ounce of Bubble Kush

Where led grow lights glisten

And wake and bake starts at dawn

 

I’m dreaming of a green Christmas

Just like my dealer downtown

Where the buds crisp and glisten

And the smell is so loud

 

May your days be uplifted and high

And may all your Kushmas be white

 

 

It’s the most whacky time of the year

With the indica and sativa spreading cheer

 

And strains growing all day long

The mood is bright with ganja aroma right

The most whacky time of the year

 

There’ll be much giggling for sharing fat blunts

And fried tales from young stoners of their favorite strains

There’ll be scary ghostly keef and tales of the smoke

That appears with giant clouds floating off of a Zong

 

It’s the most whacky time of the year

There’ll be popcorn and lots of good strains steaming

Hot green Elves singing loud songs of good tidings and joy

And carolers roasting red eyes open fire

 

It’s the most whacky time of the year

The UK Cheese, Bubble Kush, the Afghan Dream

Are drawing cannabis lovers far and near

It’s the most whacky time

It’s the baked-est season this herbal medicine can bring

 

No matter how many times you’ve blazed here

The next days high is often the most dear

There’ll be much paranoia for sharing fat blunts

 

And scary ghostly keef and tales of the smoke

That appears with giant clouds from a Zong

It’s the most baked-est season

The most baked-est season

Oh the most baked-est season of the year!

 

 

Have yourself a merry little Kushmas

Let your heart be light

From now on

Our troubles will be out of sight

 

Have yourself a merry little Kushmas

Make the Yuletide gay

From now on

Our troubles will be miles away

 

Here we are as in olden days

Happy golden days of yore

Faithful friends who are dear to us

Gather near to us once more

 

Through the years we all will be together

If the Fates allow

Hang a shining nug upon the highest bough

 

And have yourself a merry little Kushmas now

 

Here we are as in olden days

Happy golden days of yore

Faithful friends who are dear to us

Gather near to us once more

 

Through the years we all will be together

 

If the Fates allow

 

So hang a shining blunt upon the highest bough

 

And have yourself a merry little Kushmas now

 

MORE STONER CHRISTMAS SONGS, READ ON…

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