The DEA Punts on Cannabis Rescheduling Until 2025 at the Earliest

A Political Bait and Switch?

Well, well, well… it looks like the DEA is up to its old tricks again. In a move that surprises absolutely no one who’s been paying attention, our friends at the Drug Enforcement Administration have announced they’ll be holding yet another “hearing” on cannabis rescheduling. And wouldn’t you know it, this little pow-wow is conveniently scheduled for after the November election.

Funny how that works, isn’t it?

Now, let’s be clear – this kind of stonewalling from the DEA is about as predictable as a stoner getting the munchies. For decades, they’ve been dragging their feet on cannabis reform like a teenager asked to clean their room. Only recently have they deigned to put on this public spectacle of “considering rescheduling,” as if they haven’t had half a century to mull it over.

You may look back at Cannabis.net’s article on “DEA to Reschedule Weed Soon?” dated April 6th, 2016. Yep, 2016!

Remember when the Biden administration promised us reform? Yeah, me too. But what did we get? A handful of pardons that barely scratched the surface and a whole lot of the same old song and dance. It’s starting to feel like we’ve been sold a bag of oregano instead of the primo bud we were promised.

In this article, we’re going to dive into the DEA’s latest announcement and ask ourselves the million-dollar question: Is this just another political bait and switch? Strap in, folks. It’s going to be a bumpy ride through the weeds of bureaucracy and broken promises.

In a move that reeks of bureaucratic delay tactics, the DEA has announced they’re pushing their cannabis rescheduling hearing to December 6th, conveniently after the November election. It’s almost as if they’re waiting to see which way the political winds blow before making any decisions. Shocking, I know.

This hearing, supposedly, is to consider “differing expert opinions” on the Justice Department’s proposal to reschedule marijuana to Schedule III. But let’s be real – haven’t we heard all these opinions before? It’s not like cannabis suddenly became a different plant overnight.

Here’s where it gets really fun: even if cannabis does get moved to Schedule III, it’s far from a done deal. The DEA has made it clear that this wouldn’t be the end of the road. Nope, we’d still be looking at “additional controls that might be implemented, including those that might be implemented to meet U.S. treaty obligations.” In other words, welcome to regulatory purgatory, folks.

And let’s not forget the cherry on top – Schedule III is a red herring for advocates. Sure, it sounds like progress, but it’s really just a half-measure that keeps cannabis firmly under federal control. It’s like being told you can have dessert, but only if you eat your vegetables first… and the vegetables are laced with bureaucratic red tape.

So, while the DEA plays its waiting game, cannabis remains stuck in a regulatory limbo. It’s enough to make you wonder if we’re seeing real progress, or just another political smoke screen. Stay tuned, cannabis enthusiasts – this ride’s far from over.

Let’s cut through the smoke and mirrors, shall we? It’s starting to look like cannabis legalization is nothing more than a carrot on a stick, dangling just out of reach while politicians lead us wherever they damn well please.

Here’s the kicker: cannabis legalization is about as close to a national consensus as we’re likely to get in this divided country. The vast majority of Americans are on board with ending prohibition. It’s practically a unifying issue in these polarized times. So why hasn’t it happened yet?

Well, folks, it’s because politicians on both sides of the aisle are playing us like a cheap kazoo. They’re all too happy to puff up their cannabis-friendly credentials when it’s convenient, but when it comes to actually getting it done? Suddenly they’ve got more excuses than a stoner who forgot to pick up munchies.

Sure, the Democrats talk a big game about legalization, but they’ve got a catch – it’s gotta come with their pet social equity provisions. And if the Republicans dare to support legalization without these special benefits? Well, then the Dems are suddenly not so keen on the idea. It’s a political game of hot potato, and we’re the ones getting burned.

So here we are, stuck in this ridiculous limbo while both parties block legalization in their own special ways. And maybe, just maybe, that’s the whole point. Keep us distracted with this back-and-forth while they continue to exploit us for everything we’ve got. It’s enough to make you wonder if we’re being sold out faster than tickets to a Phish concert.

Look, I may not be a Washington insider, but I know a hustle when I see one. Cannabis isn’t just a plant – it’s a mechanism of control, a political football being tossed back and forth to sway votes and keep certain folks under the government’s thumb. It’s as potent a tool for oppression as it is for relaxation, depending on who’s wielding it.

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: this whole Schedule III song and dance doesn’t impress me. It’s like putting a band-aid on a bullet wound. What we really need is to toss the entire Controlled Substances Act in the compost heap and start fresh with policies actually rooted in science, not fear-mongering and corporate interests.

Speaking of corporate interests, let’s not kid ourselves about Schedule III. It’s Big Pharma’s sweet spot, and old Joe “We Beat Pharma” Biden knows it. This is the same guy who helped extend lockdowns and funnel public wealth into pharma’s coffers for a product that didn’t exactly live up to the hype. Some victory, huh?

The truth is, they’re all pharma’s lapdogs – left, right, and center. It’s time we wake up and smell the cannabis, folks. We need to break their stranglehold on us, decentralize drug manufacturing, and completely overhaul our relationship with drugs.

It’s high time (pun absolutely intended) we stop letting these political puppets jerk us around. We need real reform, not more smoke and mirrors. The power is in our hands – and our votes. Let’s use them wisely and finally clear the air in this debate once and for all.

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