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Tip For Putting Dating In A Different Light

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Let’s be honest. The whole dating process sucks. Unless you’re a very social person, the thought of sitting down to have an awkward meal or drink with a stranger isn’t the most pleasant one. Even if you enjoy getting to know people, after the fifth unsuccessful first date you might be feeling a little frustrated. Here are some tips for putting dating in a different light.

No matter how many dating books you read and dating apps you download, the process never gets any easier; dating is draining and after a while it can also make you feel insecure, like there’s something wrong with you. Getting to know people is tough and developing intimacy takes some time. There are no shortcuts.

If you hate dating, you’re not alone. The important thing is to keep trying, hold on, and try to get as much from the process as you possibly can. We looked through different dating sites and found a lot of expert tips on the subject. Here are five of them.

Fake it ’til you make it

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RELATED: 5 Reasons You Might Be Dreaming About An Ex

If you’re constantly thinking that you hate dating, then your brain is going to find a million different thoughts that support this. It’s called the law of attraction. Thoughts become your reality, so trick your brain into thinking that you’re excited over the prospect of the date and meeting new people. It may seem like a tough thing to do at first, but later on you might find that you’re actually enjoying yourself.

Have some patience

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Take the necessary time to find someone you truly like and don’t force yourself to date anyone just because you can’t find anyone else. This process may take some time or it may end after a month of actively going on dates. Have an open mind and be willing to open up to people who may have different interests than you.

Date in spurts

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If the dating process is too exhausting for you and it takes a toll on different areas of your life, take a break of a month or two and then go back to it. Date in spurts, using the time off to work on yourself, read books, watch some TV shows, and hang out with friends. Try again once you’re feeling excited over the prospect.

Find a new hobby

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RELATED: Looking For Love In 2019? Try These 4 New Year’s Resolutions

It might seem crazy to fit in dating and a new hobby into your life, but it can also help you find pleasure in your day-to-day routine and make things less stressful for you. “Finding some relaxation and inner peace can help you feel better when you do go out there,” says matchmaker Stef Safran.

Don’t equate dating with sex

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If the thought of hooking up after dates stresses you out, consider each of these outings as an opportunity to meet new and interesting people. Try to remove the pressure of sex and just try to have fun hanging out with someone new.



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American Heart Association

Naps Done Right Can Make a Huge Difference

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Weekends are made for naps, but done right they can make your week better also!

The body is a machine which needs fuel, maintenance and downtime.  Around 30% of people don’t get enough night sleep during the week, which can cause problems during the waking hours. There has been a stigma around napping as being lazy, but often those “judging” are not giving their own body enough time to rest, refocus and beenergized for the challenges of day to day life.  Data shows it is good for you and naps done right can make a huge difference.

RELATED: Does Hitting The Snooze Button Help Or Hinder Sleep

Everyone is different and bodies need certain things to function, enough rest is one. Healthy sleep is one of the American Heart Association’s Life’s Essential 8, their guide for improving and maintaining health.  Naps can reduced fatigue, increased alertness, improve your mood and performance, and help with memory.  But there are some guidelines…don’t sleep too long, don’t nap to close to your bedtime, and the following key lessons.

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Figure out the right nap for the moment

The National Sleep Foundation shares there are three kinds of naps, each with their own patterns and effects. Planned napping, emergency napping and habitual napping. The first is when people sleep before they get tired, the second is when they nap because they’re exhausted and they have to, and the third is when they make a habit out of daily naps. Find the option that works best for you and you needs.

Naps should be short.

Productive naps are between 10-20 or so minutes. While we think of the more sleep the better, this is a case of a little goes a long way. Studies show a 10 minute nap can make people feel rested and prepared for the rest of their day. In fact, sleeping for over 30 minutes can disrupt in nightly sleeping patterns, which can alter your nights and productivity. Set an alarm for your naps, keeping them to a defined time, especially if you’re napping habitually and are not catching up on missed sleep.

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Once awake, start moving

Weekends can be made for lounging around and being lazy. Spend all day in bed or lounging in the couch and end up sleeping on and off.  But hese sessions can result in blurry days where the hours fly by and you end up feeling exhausted. It results in having trouble sleeping at night and not being rested. Days like these disrupt your circadian rhythms. Naps work best when they’re planned, with some activity and movement before and after.

Develop a schedule

Going to sleep at the same time every night provides plenty of positive results, helping you maintain a schedule and develop better sleeping habits. It’s the same with naps. “The brain prefers to anticipate something, not react to it. A nap is no different, which is why a scheduled nap always works better over the long haul when compared to a random nap.” This schedule shouldn’t force you to nap everyday, instead, it should help you nap more easily and feel more rested. Hope you can use the tips to make the most out of naps.



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boring

How To Figure Out If You Are Boring

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It is rare for someone to go through life without running into someone who is dull – but to figure out if you are the boring one!

Nothing is worse than being stuck in a meeting, at a dinner, or in a car with someone who is dull and boring. They can’t help it, but they can make the best topics tiresome and miserable.  But what if you discovered you are the boring one?  At some point, lack of energy, mind somewhere else, and other things can make one temporarily dull. But it is being dull in the long term which is painful for you and others.  Here is how to figure out if you are boring.

RELATED: 5 Morning Activities To Help You Feel Happier

The University of Essex in the UK published a paper on traits of dull people. Published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, it covered personal traits and the dullest hobbies (top ones – watching TV, bird watching and smoking). Most people (53%) have 1-4 close friends, (38%) say they have five or more. Some 8% say they have no close friends. You can help not only friendships but family and partner relationships but following this advice.

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Listening Skills

Boring people are poor conversationalists, and poor conversationalists tend to be the worst listeners. Communication is as much about talking as it is about being silent and listening to what the other person is saying. An engaging conversation isn’t one filled with the funniest jokes and the most interesting stories, it’s one where there is an exchange of ideas and conversations. Discover a curious streak and you will learn and time will become more interesting.  Ask relevant questions and let those in the know express themselves.

RELATED: 5 Ways To Make Friends Outside Of Work And School

Practice patience

Conversations are not competitions, rather it is a way to learn and engage with others. Basic “your turn, my turn” conversation etiquette is taught from a young age. It is no surprise some people have no self-control and allow themselves to take over conversations without giving the others a chance to speak. Work on controlling impulses and push yourself to listen to others.

On the flip side, if your problem is too shy and have a hard time opening up, try to practice and to find ways of making yourself more accessible and of speaking your mind.  Practice with family or friends making conversation, read information and explore things which of interest.

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Pay attention

Keep an eye out for people’s body languages whenever you’re talking. If they look distracted, are avoiding eye contact and keep on trying to change the subject then you are probably acting very annoying and boring. Train yourself to pick up on these hints and social cues and try to avoid overstaying your conversational welcome. It is ok to move on, sometimes it is you, sometimes it is them…but being aware can shorten a tough situation.

RELATED: Beer Sales Flatten Thanks To Marijuana

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Build boundaries

Balance is one of the most important parts of conversations but it’s also pretty hard to define. Vulnerability is needed for a meaningful exchange, but too much of it and it’s kind of disastrous. Think about what you are talking about on consistent basis.

Complaining about how awful your life is and how unfair your job will not gain you any friends, even if this is a common behavior. Always aim for sincerity and get to know your audience; don’t tell a stranger your deepest and darkest secrets.



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Cannabis

The 5 Best Mom’s Love Language Gifts

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Sunday is Mother’s Day – the day mom are celebrated for all the extra effort they do to make kids life special.  First celebrated in 1907, it became official in the US in 1914 and Canada in 1915.  Between the two countries, spending is expected to reach an all-time high of $35.7 billion this year.  Some of it will be enjoyed, some may not. Here are the 5 best Mom’s love language gifts (and one might be weed!).

RELATED: People Are Choosing Marijuana Over Sleep Aids

 This love language is all about verbal acknowledgments of affection, compliments, words of appreciation and encouragement.  

6 Cannabis Gifts For Mother's Day: CBD, Pre-Rolls And More
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Words of Affirmation

Try a special way to tell her you love her. Make a book (easy to do online) of special pictures of the two of you. Write her a letter about what she means to you. You can get her favorite podcast host or even reality TV star to send her a special Mother’s Day shoutout (check out Cameo and all the celebrities they have available). Or consider compiling a video from all the kids and family answer the question ‘why we love you.’ 

Receiving Gifts 

These people enjoy receiving gifts and symbols of love. Monetary value is usually not important but more so the thought and reflection behind the gift.  

 

You can spoil her with luxury and a gift she would never buy herself. While gifts don’t need to be expensive, treat her to something luxurious that you know she wouldn’t want to spend the money on for herself. Think of what she loves and work around it.  Gift cards for books, music, travel, etc can show you want her to enjoy life.

Another thing, what about giving a gift which could help their sleep, mental health or manage pain.  A gummy or edible would be a perfect gift.  Maybe a CBD cream which could help with muscle soreness?

Quality Time 

People who enjoy this love language want someone to spend uninterrupted time with them, make plans and be fully present in their conversations during these times.  Give a gift of an all-inclusive day.  Give a Saturday which could include brunch, a walk, and more.

Gift a unique experience. Anyone can plan brunch or a wine tasting but what about surprising mom with something special. Some ideas include a picnic or colorful charcuterie board with all her favorite foods, a self-portrait session or a local food tour.  

Acts of Service

This love language includes doing favors or taking the burden off the person you are showing love to.  Will cook a special meal, take them a car trip, doing garden together, anything which your Mom would love to do.

Touch 

These people feel loved when they receive physical signs of affection, including kissing, holding hands, and cuddling, to name a few. 

Spoil her with a gift that will make her senses go crazy. While a spa day may seem obvious here and certainly fits the bill, you can also try something unique such as dance classes or something to make her feel extra cozy such as a weighted blanket, robe or new luxury sheets.   

There are many new and fun ways to spoil mom this year. Take it to the next level this time around by considering what will make them feel most loved.



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